2 Years!!

I realized on Friday that this weekend marks the 2 year anniversary of my diagnosis. It was a kind of sudden realization and I'd almost thought it had passed me by without notice until I checked my Google Calendar for the exact dates of appointments. (10/2/09 was the date of my appointment at the first awful oncology office during which I got my official diagnosis and had an awful failed attempt at a bone marrow biopsy).
I've got pretty mixed emotions about this whole 2 year anniversary. I can't believe it was only 2 years ago. It seems like it's been so much longer! Besides that, it just feels strange to me. Not a day goes by that I'm not, in some way, reminded of my cancer and my treatment. Some days, it's just noticing the bruise like scar on my arm from my test dose of bleomycin. I catch a glimpse of it and wonder for a split second how I got a bruise in such an odd spot, before remembering it's not a bruise, just a permanent reminder of treatment. Other days, I realize, on a bigger level, how having Hodgkin's affected my life. How it ultimately cost me my job and how I'm still very sad about that.
I know that I appreciate life more, or perhaps, differently since my diagnosis. I definitely don't feel like the stereotypical cancer survivor, so happy to have survived and with a new super positive outlook on live, though. I feel like a failure in that regard, sometimes. Like I should appreciate life even more now or something. My mind is just a swirl of different emotions and I think it'll just take time to sort out. Maybe I'll have a cheerier post next Oct 2nd.

Quick life update: My new job is going pretty well. It's a much, uh, slower, pace than I'm used to. Overall, things are going well at work though. Josh still loves his job. We're mostly settled into our house...just need to hang up pictures (which might happen next month when Josh finishes his summer turtle job)! The pets are all doing fine (and crazy, in the case of the cats). The biggest stress right now is my car, which, I've come to realize in the past few days, needs replaced ASAP. So, besides the car, things are mostly settling down and that's perfectly fine with me!!